Sergeant Ridiculous EP — Update… Fehler Nach Fehler.

Somewhere in all the re-mixing and remastering, something screwy crept into my original version of the Sergeant Ridiculous track. So if you downloaded either the Zip or the original track, you can get the new improved version without the drums cutting out inexplicably. Sorry for the very unprofessional fuck up. As it happens, I am an unprofessional fuckup.

Thanks to Stefan Robbers, the sideways namesake for this release for letting me know about this.


The zip of the entire release is updated as well. Go to the Sergeant Ridiculous Page to grab it… and tell your friends and enemies and frenemies.

Sergeant Ridiculous, Tumescent In Repose
Sergeant Ridiculous, Tumescent In Repose

Epic Laundry sample set?

Guy taps and bangs on stuff in his laundry room, releases sample set.

It’s worth listening to the audio examples. It sounds exactly like you’d imagine — washing machines getting tapped, thumped and slammed. I sampled the water sloshing in my washer years ago for a track; this is precisely the sort of thing you should be doing for yourself, not buying a sample set.

Though I wish this guy well. Everything sounds very well recorded and he spent extra time with Kontakt programming to make them cool. But really, isn’t it a REQUIREMENT that you sample junk around your house for yourself?

In that unwritten book of rules for electronic musicians, that is!

Dave Smith Mopho goes Keerazy with Random Patch Generator

This is Dave Smith Instruments’ Mopho playing some patches generated randomly by the Mopho Pro Editor.

The Mopho Pro Editor is like any other editor for external MIDI instruments: It’s kind of buggy and ill-documented, and half the time something about it doesn’t work and you can’t figure out why. But when it does work, two features make it extremely valuable: The random patch generator and the ‘program genetics.’

The former is what it sounds like — it generates random patches, and you can control which parameters it randomizes. The ‘program genetics’ starts from two existing Mopho patches and ‘breeds’ them to generate new patches. The cool thing about these two features is that it generates sounds you’d never program on purpose; and in fact, I’m frankly mystified about how the Mopho’s fairly straightforward architecture could even make the sounds it does.

Example #1 — an assortment of generated patches, one after another, with tweaking:

Example #2 — One of my generated patches, playing itself. I have no idea where all the crackly stuff comes from.

Feel free to use these samples however you like.

Paul Stretch (extreme audio time stretching) for OS X to download!


It has links to a more recent build, the PPC build, etc.

Yesterday I couldn’t spell OS X Developer and now, I are one!

With some help from my friends on the CMake mailing list I finally got a running standalone OS X application built out of the Paul Stretch source. As I wrote yesterday, it’s free, it’s easy, and it makes hours of freaky soundscapes out of any audio file.

Except for mp3 files. If you try and load an MP3 file it locks up. Oh, and it wants WAV or OGG files — as far as I know it can’t load AIF files. But it’s free, right?

Repost: Free Program for Extreme Time Stretch

Sorry for repost, but apparently, this post got trashed in my Blog SQL database. Eff me silly, computers suck. Apparently the post showed up long enough for MKB to comment on it, but then went to the great bit bucket in the sky.

The quaintly named Paul Stretch is a program that does extreme time stretching of digital audio. It’s free and open source, so anyone can try it. I even was able to build it on OS X, but not yet in a way that permits redistribution — you can do a lot of Unix-style programming on OS X and never build up the knowledge that building a native application requires.

Anyhow it turns any audio into pleasant ambient textures. Exampla gratia:

Bitone Troupe “All Is Full Of Love”

The first 30 seconds or so, timestretched to several minutes


Rolling Stone Prejudice Against Anything Un-Rawkish Abides

Rolling Stone still thinks Lou Reed’s Metal Machine Music is Controversial?

Really? Hasn’t it always been blindingly obvious that “Metal Machine Music” is not intended as listening music for general audiences? I thought this was all settled canon law a long time ago.

I am especially puzzled by all the people showing up and then leaving. Did they think he was going to play them lullabies?

There is an audience for noise music. Not a huge audience, but a genuine, enthusiastic audience. One that responds viscerally and emotionally to the music, in addition to the people who have intellectual, academic reasons for why it’s valid. The point is, there are many writers Rolling Stone could have sent to the MMM show that would have brought some sympathy and understanding to the event. Instead, they sent someone, apparently, who just got done sucking Fall Out Boy dick or something.

If you ever wanted to know why Lou Reed is so rude to US music journalists, this review is exhibit A. They aren’t even fucking pretending to try.

Is Boomkat’s “Also bought” Algorithm a bit too on the nose?

I spend more time than is probably healthy (financially or otherwise) exploring new music on Boomkat. They seem to have fairly no-bullshit reviews for music, and they seem intent on hyping things they actually like, for actual musical reasons. As opposed to a site like Beatport, who seem to hype stuff based on who has the best cocaine this week.

I know, totally unfair dig, but a visit to Beatport conjures visions of Guidos in fake Hermes sunglasses bro-hugging each other in the DJ booth at WMC, and a visit to Boomkat makes you feel like you’ve been cornered by a scruffy British college student chain-smoking rollies, drinking tea out of a paper cup, telling you how mental the latest Pinch dub plate is in a thick Mancunian drawl.

But the recommendations they make based on the release you’re currently looking at seem a bit weird. I mean if I look at Appleblim and Peverelist “Over here” remixes, the “also bought” column contains 12 releases out of 21 that I’ve bought myself. And looking through the ones I’ve not bought, at least 5 or 6 others I’d probably buy if money was no object.

This seems strange to me — could there be some grouping of Boomkat customers out there whose taste is that closely aligned with my own? Or is Boomkat’s algorithm somehow just reflecting back to me what I’ve already bought, along with a bunch of roughly similar releases?

I’d like to think that I’m genuinely part of some phantom cohort of people who really like dub techno, house music, and dubstep without the wibby-wubby basslines. I’d like to meet up with them, preferably at a club with a good sound system in Brixton.

Martyn: Tall, Dutch, & Dubsteppy

The Dubstep Yamo B There Connection

Pangaea is a producer in the Dubstep vein that I like quite a lot for being one of the guys who resists the siren call of the obnoxious wobble bass.

He’s not about a bit of appropriation, specifically the chopped, screwed, and pitch-shifted R&B Vocal thing that Burial employed to great affect on his long player Untrue. He also share’s Burial’s love of ElB’s chicken scratch 2 step beats. He’s not a complete Burial clone though, but he definitely scratches some of the same itches for me.

But whether or not he’s original or derivative is irrelevant to this post; what I’m wondering is if my suspicions are true and his track “Router” contains a vocal sample of comedy punching bag Michael McDonald, of the Steely Dan, Doobie Brothers, and Ya Mo B There fame. It sure sounds like it, though I can’t identify the particular track. Furthermore, tracking it down would require listening to the Michael Macdonald oeuvre, something that could put me right over the fucking edge.


The most unfortunate Michael Mcdonald picture I could find.
The most unfortunate Michael Mcdonald picture I could find.


I found the track Pangaea sampled: Baby I’m For Real. God what a slab of shite.

KRUI Noise Radio Chaircrusher DJ Mixes

Here they are, hot off the presses. Turn your speakers DOWN before you play them because I noticed in studio that the bass on these is huge. Something I’ll watch out for on future mixes. Doesn’t sound distorted or bad, just HUGE.

Track Listings

Mix 1

CongosCongoman (12″ Mix)
New World AquariumNY
Patrice ScottDo You Feel Me
ChaircrusherSergeant Ridiculous
DeadbeatSun People
East IslandMaster of Servir
AmeSun Sugar
XDBDescap Live
VoomVoomSau Verought
Stewart WalkerStundenzimmer
Serge GainsbourgNew York USA (Chaircrusher Edit)
Bochum WeltB2
2562Moog Dub
Raymond ScottToy Typewriter (Chaircrusher Remix)

Mix 2

Omar-SLuv U Alex
Rick WadeI can’t Take It
Patrice ScottSunrise Dub Mix
Mike HuckabyFantasy
Reggie DokesMissing You
MoodymanSweet Yesterday
Osunlade139th Street
Ian PooleyIn Other Words
TyreeAcid Crash
Steve Silk Hurley feat. M DocIt’s Percussion
Cerrone ParadiseJoey Negro Remix
First ChoiceLet No Man Put Asunder
Terrence Parker vs Joe SmoothLove’s Got Me High/Forever My Love
Derrick May vs Octave OneStrings of Love/Blackwater

Pluggo gratification

Well it took 4 days, but my shiny new Pluggo is authorized. In honor of this I put together a sort of fake techno jam:
Pluggo Test

All sounds are from Pluggo Instruments — Analog Drums, Analog Percussion, Deep Bass, Additive Heaven. Pluggo FX are Feeback Network and Chamberverb. Other than that I used a limiter on the channel playing the Feedback Network.

Of course, Pluggo is wacky, and one unusual wackiness is that the instruments can stumble rhythmically. You can hear this happening at 1:16…

I can see why a lot of people don’t think very highly of Pluggo; compared to a lot of other plugins they’re kind of difficult to control and they can sound really raw, even ugly. Of course those are the things I like about them. They’re a nice compromise between the
low level monkeying you have to do with Reaktor or Max, and the limited sonic possibilities of more straightforward plugins.

Oh and ‘Pluggo’ is also, apparently, the manufacturer of of machines that put the rubber caps on sterile blood sample vials.


SO FAR SO SO: Retrospective 1995-2005

I’ve been meaning to do this for some time, so here goes. This is a collection of unreleased songs from my back catalog. There’s all sorts of genres represented, but in choosing the tracks, I tried to pick songs that were the best example of I was doing at any given time. I haven’t dated them here, but some of them date themselves. For example, when was it a big deal to do an Amen break track? When were 90BPM hip hop instrumentals something people made a million of?

These tracks are lousy with uncleared samples; consequently if anyone actually recognizes a sample of their work and objects I’ll remove the file.

If someone takes a particular shine to a track and wants to remix it let me know. Most of these only exist as mixdowns of long-lost percursor files and sequences, but if I can provide individual sounds, I’d be happy to.

So Far So So — one zip file

1. NYE[audio:]

2. Morton’s Shadow (samples from Morton Subotnick “Silver Apples of the Moon” and DJ Shadow) [audio:]

3. Lucas[audio:]

4. Noise Dub[audio:]

5. Grandiose (with Lucas Williams on Guitar)[audio:]

6. Sweetness (samples Lush)[audio:]

7. Windchime[audio:]

8. Monked (samples Theleonius Monk and Weather Report)[audio:]

9. The Wrong Trousers (with Axy Jeeb)[audio:]

10. Mayday[audio:]

11. Little Miss (samples Raymond Scott and Elaine Elias)[audio:]

12. Inna (samples Inna & the Farlanders)[audio:]

13. Hubert (samples Hubert Laws)[audio:]

14. Honey (samples (samples Sweet Honey In The Rock)[audio:]

15. Gee Why[audio:]

16. Busy Signal[audio:]

17. AD Remix (based on samples from Andrew Duke)[audio:]

18. Labor Day[audio:]

19. Nativity (samples some crazy bible story 7″ record)[audio:]

20. Redux [audio:]

Creative Commons License
SO FAR SO SO by Kent Williams is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.
Based on a work at